there is no place like home

There really is no place like home.

My thoughts are all jumbled and I am probably not going to make any sense.. but below are my thoughts trying to be pieced together.

I think, for the first time since being in college, I have really missed being home in Southern California. I have been thinking a lot in past couple of weeks about my life here and up in Washington; I live two completely different lives in two very different worlds on opposite poles of the country in the West. I have been trying to piece together what makes up the different cultures in these two very different places and how I fit into the whole picture. I cannot quite figure it out yet - maybe I never will.

Initially upon applying for college, while in high school, I just needed to get out. I didn't want to stay in California, and I only really applied to one school here. I needed to get out of the little bubble that I lived in; I needed to experience something different, something new, something exciting, something challenging. My attitude was not quite right though. It was that of a dislike for my home, for Southern California and its culture in general. So, when I would come home, though it would be wonderful to see my family, I didn't come back with the right attitude. I know it doesn't matter anymore, and I am where I am for a reason, but I wish I had a more open mind.

This time I am home, though, something has changed. My attitude toward my home is different; it is more healthy, positive, and I actually really like being here. Maybe I needed to get out in order to really appreciate my home and my friends here. For two years since graduation, I sort of just disappeared from the face of California. This time though, I have seen a lot of my friends and peers that I have not seen in years, and it has been so wonderful.

So, yes, this is my home and I am happy and proud to be from it. I have been home now for about 2 and a half weeks, and I have only a week left! It is crazy how time flies. As soon as I get back, chaos will begin.

Since being home, I have..

1. Successfully got a normal tan, meaning I am no longer white and pasty like I have been for the past two years, and I don't have a farmers than that I got from the field.

2. Ate sushi on at least 3 separate occasions, drank boba, ate froyo, ate asian styled shaved iced, etc. Basically, I have gotten my intake of Asian food that should last me probably only a week until I miss it when I am back in Washington.

3. Ate In-n Out, of course. Grilled cheese style.

4. Gone to the beach a number of times, soaking in the sun!

5. Became much more comfortable driving on the crazy freeways here. I hate the freeway, but being obligated to drive it so often has been a good thing to make me more comfortable using them.

6. Fantasized about going to Disneyland... someday.. someday I'll be back. :)

7. Though about my life and future, A LOT. I will be going to OT school after graduation. And I decided that if everything works out, I am about 80% sure that I will be taking a leave of absence  from Whitman for Spring 2013 for a number of reasons. I was originally planning on graduating a semester early, but this way, I can take c.c. classes needed to go to grad school (whitman doesn't offer 4 really imp't classes that I need to go to OT school :/ ) while also getting an internship, graduate normally with my class in May, and save a lot of mons. I was planning to take a semester off anyway, just at the end, but I figured it's probably best to do so in the middle.

And within the next couple of days I will have...

1. Watched my little brother in his marching band on the big screen at the Spectrum movie theater!! He is in a national traveling marching band.

2. Learned how to surf (SO EXCITED TO DO THIS!). It scares me, but I've been learning that I should do the things that scare me.

inked.

I wasn't initially going to write a blogpost on this, but clearly.. I just decided to do it.

I did it; I got a tattoo. What a rebel I am. I think this is the most rebellious thing I've done.

I just got it yesterday at a small shop in Walla Walla. I went in with a friend who was my moral support, as I held her hand the entire time. Frankly, I was more nervous before the artist started than actually during it. When I was on the table, I just thought to myself that I couldn't believe I was actually doing this and wondering what I got myself into. I don't like needles... or pain. Surprisingly, it was not actually that bad. But also, it only took about 10 minutes and it is the tiniest thing ever. I don't think I could've gotten it anywhere else or anything bigger.

For the longest time, I had such a conflict in my mind about getting a tattoo, and even including my decision to get a second ear piercing. I know that, yes, this is my own life and it is my own body. But I also know that my parents disapprove (you're probably reading this blog). And the worst thing in the world is the feeling of disappointing my parents. However, I also know that they know that I am my own person and can make my own decisions.

So what made me do it? I feel like it was a combination of many factors. Well for one, I knew that I wouldn't regret it - I knew it would be tiny and that it would be my one and only. Ever since I saw this ankle tattoo on one of my mom's friends when I was around 6 years old, I knew that if I ever were to get a tattoo, it would be in that location (or proximity, as least. mine is a little below). I would never get anything other than on that spot, and I would never get anything bigger than a quarter. In Sweden last summer, I was so close to getting a tattoo, but it just wasn't the right time or setting; I would want my tattoo to mean something, and I just didn't know what to get. A classmate of mine in Sweden, got the tattoo of an earthworm on her foot, showing her love for annelids. Until now, I didn't know what I would even get - but just recently I stumbled upon Ohana and loved it. Maybe was also partly the boredom of being in Walla Walla that has driven me to this, but that isn't quite a logical or reasonable excuse. 

I knew Ohana was just right, as it has a multitude of meanings for me. 

"Ohana means family, and family means no one gets forgotten or left behind," a classic line from the Disney movie, Lilo & Stitch. To me, my home is wherever my family is. I am at a point in my life when I am home for only a little over a month a year, and I believe it will only get smaller. So, this serve as a reminder for me to always keep them in my mind and in my heart, wherever I may be in the world. 

Secondly, Ohana reminds me of my grandpa who passed away when I was in 6th grade. I visited my grandparents who lived in Hawaii at the time in the summer between 5th and 6th grade. So, it reminds me of him, my time in Hawaii, and the fact that I want to go back one day.. maybe even to live.

And thirdly, it reminds me that my friends and the wonderful people I am with on a daily basis are my family. 

On another note, here are some more pictures of my summer in Walla Walla! 

In the back of our yard, lined up all along the railroad tracks is a boysenberry bush full of delicious, juicy fruit. SOOO NOMMY!

Iced coffee and a treat from the Patisserie!

dear summer, please slow down

Dear Summer,

Please, please slow down. Take a breather, pause for just a moment, and don't go on so quickly. I want to enjoy you, and I am not ready to accept the fact that I am going to be a junior (and a half?) soon.

My summer in Walla Walla is coming to a bittersweet end. I only have about 4 full days left here. My time back in southern california is undetermined for now; I will definitely be staying until the 13th of August to help out with errands for my family, but won't be staying any later than the 20th, as I need to come back to prepare for school and Theta to start back up again. I would definitely say that everyone needs to spend at least one of their summers at Whitman in Walla Walla. I mean, why not right? (If you can find a job, of course). It is good to be here when the pace of life is a lot slower and not constantly consumed by papers, tests, multitudes of activities and meetings that you must attend, and just the overall stress. It gives being in Walla Walla a different feel.

The summer is full of festivals, great local produce and crafts at the farmer's market, hot (and when I say hot, I mean hotttt) summer days, many warm summer thunder storms, many trips out to the fountain and ankeny to run in the sprinklers, Walla Walla Sweets baseball games, and more. Collectively, this list seems like the perfect summer and I am definitely making it seem romanticized. In reality, most days I was too tired after work to do anything but eat dinner, watch a little on netflix, and go to sleep. However, the days where things are a little different, with a little special treat of a Sweets game or a trip to Brights, are something to remember and cherish.

At the Walla Walla Sweet Onion Festival

Walla Walla Sweets Game at the Borleskie Stadium. We did in fact watch the baseball game, I promise.

In the next four days, I hope to spend as much time with friends here as possible. I am doing something out of the ordinary tomorrow at 2PM, which I may or may not blog about later, but you can just ask. Everyday this week I hope to go to the gym and take advantage of the facility. It's going to take a lot of mental effort, but it WILL happen.

And when I get home.. I just hope to really really enjoy just being surrounded by the people I love and try my best to live in the present, keep busy, and meet up with friends. Most summers/breaks I've gone home, I get pretty tired and it's easy for me to being negative, but I am really hoping that things will be a little bit different this time. I hope to continue working on my crafting, as well as a project that I am hoping to do. It is going to be difficult, and I know that it will take a long time, but I would love to document the story of my grandparents. We'll see how it goes.

So that I can just enjoy you more both in the short time I have left in Walla Walla and my time back home, please consider my plea and don't run so fast.

Thanks,

Shelley

meadow on the ledge

Yesterday, I finally launched my crafting business online via esty and facebook, and hopefully someday on an official website. This was one of my summer goals/life goals in general, and I finally had the time to put it all together. It is still in its baby stages and it certainly needs quite a lot of work, but for now, I am very happy with it! I have tried to do something like this before for bags I created in high school, but it didn't work out. I have high hopes for this one. I am satisfied with the name, "Meadow On the Ledge", which though it sounds weird, I love. It is the British meaning of my name, "Shelley", and it could not be a better description of where I find the most of my inspiration for my creations, or for just life in general. I'll be starting a blog for my crafting biz, but that'll be in the works a bit later on. Maybe soon, maybe not; it depends on how much time I have on my hands. I don't know where this biz is going to lead me, but I would just like to be surprised and see what happens! For now, my goal is to have itself pay off and then help pay my phone bill, at the least. 

On another note, I have been pretty busy over the past week or so. I fly down to Tucson, Arizona for Kappa Alpha Theta's 70th Grand Convention, which was a unique and awesome experience. It was amazing to see and talk to so many Thetas all around the nation + Canada. It is amazing that though I do not know all the Theta women in the world and though we are all so different, we are all connected by this special bond of sisterhood. While in Tucson, I also got to see a good friend of mine (who also happened to be a Theta) and she showed me around her home! The landscape is like nothing I have ever seen before. It was soooo hot, for one. People don't have lawns. There are all kinda of cacti all over the place! She took me on a hike at Mt. Lemmon, which was gorgeous, as well as to one of the Arizona State Parks for a scenic drive. 

Below are pictures at the hotel I stayed at, the State Park, as well as beautiful Mt. Lemmon!

I was in Arizona for about a week, and immediately when I got back I continued to work out in the field counting grass! The weather got incredibly hot, in the high 90s and probably low 100s, so Emma and I headed out at 6am for a couple of days until we finished! I am pretty much done with my research for now, which is pretty exciting. It's been going on 6 days a week, about 40/hrs a week, for the past couple of months since school ended in early May. I have thoroughly enjoyed the field work, and I can't wait to do it next year! However, it's also realllly nice to finally be done. I now have my summer back and time to do things I didn't have time to do before (like my crafting biz!). And soon, I'll be going back home to socal for a couple of weeks or so. I'm missing the beach.

The Ominous Clouds Are Upon Us

This day, June 23, 2012, marks one of the strangest and most interesting days of my days in Walla Walla (and maybe even my life). It involves a coming of a storm, ominous clouds, hail, a motorcycle accident, a trip to Pasco, and 3 pounds of cherries.

The morning started out as a normal day at work out in the field. Emma and I checked the weather in the morning to make sure it was not going to rain today, and all seemed well for today. Nowhere on the radar did it say that there was rain coming. Anyway, we went out into the field and it was a beautiful day with a clear blue sky. We started counting our blue bunch out in the warm sun. As we were about to finish our last section of our transect, we looked up and over the hills, we started to see just a few white clouds heading our way. We continued counting and a little while later, we looked up again, but to see dark, rolling clouds coming our way. The sight of the clouds were simply amazing and looked so ominous. Looking to the northeast, you could see only blue sky, but when looking to the southwest, all you saw were these dark clouds. 

Imagine these clouds rolling toward you and directly over your head. 

We decided to just keep counting and minding our own business, only to look up every 5 or so minutes to see the clouds coming closer and closer and getting darker and darker; they looked menacing. Soon enough the clouds covered up the sun and we saw the shade line overcoming us and the region all around us. One the line of shade passed us, we could immediately feel the change in the air. We could no longer feel the beating rays of the sun, but the chill of the wind and the air. Wanting to finish the transect, we decided to keep counting until we felt the first drop of rain or clap of thunder. Soon enough, we felt the first drop of rain, and we decided to pack up. However, it changed from one drop of rain to big and fat rain drops to buckets of m&m sized hail in a matter of 30 or so seconds. We scrambled to gather up all our materials and ran down that hill faster than ever, with hail pelting us from above. The hail hit us in the back, in the arms, on the head, and even hit my lip pretty darn hard. I've never been in anything like this. By the time we got down to the hill, we were both completely soaked from head to toe. We definitely tested our quick-dry pants from that experience, and I am glad to tell you they work great ;). This storm and these clouds were one of the most amazing, yet somewhat frightening sights I have ever seen. It was amazing to see this storm approach, from the beginning to the end.

We soon got out of the hills and back on the Highway to head home for the day, but a few miles down the road, the traffic was stopped. We waited in traffic for about 30 minutes, until we were told that we would need to wait at least another hour until we could pass. Unfortunately, there is only one main highway leading to Walla Walla. It's our only way home, and it was blocked. Apparently what happened is that a motorcyclist was thrown off his vehicle around a bend, and run over by a large truck. We were told that he was deceased, and the cars were stalled because we needed to wait for people to removed him from the highway. He was just lying in the middle of the road, something I did not want to think about or see. This was such a sad, sad thing to hear. 

Since we had to wait at least an hour until traffic cleared, Emma and I decided to go to Pasco to pick up some things she and I both needed. On our way back home, we ran low on gas, so stopped at the next gas station, filled up, and discovered a fruit farm that sold cherries. The cherries were sold in a sketch white building without any signs on it, but we decided to go in together. We ended up getting 3 lbs. of the most delicious bing cherries for only two bucks! It was such a pleasant surprise, and they are the most amazing fresh picked bing cherries I have ever tasted. OMMNOMSSSSS. 

We made it home safely without any further strange occurrences, but I can certainly say that this day is going to be a memorable one.

twenty years

I have now been on this earth for a whopping twenty years. It's quite a paradox, how young I still feel (I feel like I am still fifteen years old), but also how old I feel to call myself twenty. Though with many ups and down, I have had a great twenty years, filled with so many blessings and wonderful family and friends.

My family flew me down for the weekend to spend my birthday with them. Today marked the last day that I'll be seeing my second eldest brother, who will be teaching English in Japan for a year (or maybe even two). However, it also marked the first day I saw all of my family for the first time in 6 months. And it marked the first day to the beginning of my life as a young adult (no longer a teenager).

I want my twentieth year to be remarkable, even more so than any year I have ever experienced. I want it to be different; I want it to be filled with positivity, with joy, with passion, and with confidence. I want it to be filled with moments that I want to cherish forever. I want it to be a year of many firsts. I want it to be a year of spontaneity, but also a year focused toward achieving my best and looking toward the future. I want this year to be a year of growth in many aspects of my life. I want this year to be lived in the moment to its fullest, rather than going through the motions (which I felt I have done so much this whole semester). I know this is is all so vague and it cannot all be achieved, but this is what I wish for myself over the next year.

Peace.

there's a dead hawk in the car

It is funny how things happen, how moments occur at a certain time. All the moments preceding a certain event all leads up to it; if even one thing were out of place and caused a delay or sped up time in one's routine, this event would be different.

Today, driving out to the field was a little different. Today, Emma and I were taking our professor out to the field, but as he had some unfinished business to attend, we drove out about 30 minutes later than usual. I was driving on the highway behind this red pick-up truck on my toward the site listening to the Beatles when I caught a glimpse of something in the road ahead. Everything happened so quickly, but I saw a bird from afar flap its wings and carry its food (roadkill in the road) in its claws slightly off the ground. The next thing I know, the bird, which happened to be a Swainsons Hawk, rolled underneath the car and along the road. I slowed down and tried to avoid the bird in the road, and my professor told me to pull over on the side of the road. I pulled over quite a ways away, but my professor got out of the car, picked up the bird in his arms, and kicked the dead carcass (the roadkill in its claws) off the side of the road. He picked it up like it was nothing, but for me to see that, it certainly wasn't nothing. He brought the bird into the car, and there was thankfully a plastic bag in the car. As he brought it in, I couldn't look it it; it was so lifeless. If the red truck just slowed down, even a little bit, this beautiful hawk could've survived. But now, it was in the car. Dead. There was a dead bird in the car I was driving. My professor is going to freeze it and use it for one of his classes, but still.

What an interesting drive it was today. I will certainly be looking out for birds on the road from now on.