I am from

A poem in progress. I wrote a former version of this poem as an exercise for a session at res life training, and I actually really loved it. I don't really write poems, and I'm not so great at it either, but I did enjoy writing this one.

I am from

I am from
my mother
the most caring woman
my father
the most adventurous man
the constant buzz and companionship of my siblings
the loving arms of my grandparents
family
the taste of McDonalds hamburgers
but also the deliciousness of fresh sushi and dim-sum
boba tea every friday night after youth group and church on sundays
creativity
an over active imagination
the belief in a magical world
the belief of fairies and leprechauns
weekly trips to the happiest place on earth
weekly trips to see Snoopy and friends
conservative, yet not too conservative values
the saying that if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it
the golden rule
the knowledge that God loves me
the idea that Jesus is in my heart
the reality that money does not come on trees
the endless fields of Bakersfield, California
the loving home of San Dimas, California
the small island of American Samoa
the outdoors of Lake Oswego, Oregon
the clouds of West Linn, Oregon
the suburbs of Irvine, California
the wheat fields and sweet onions of Walla Walla, Washington
the gloom of Tacoma, Washington
wishes and dreams
the discovery of my purpose to love and to be loved
the multitude of all the experiences and opportunities I've been given
the opportunity to receive an amazing high school education
the opportunity to to pursue a college degree at not one, but three different colleges
the opportunity to discover and pursue my dreams
the struggles of leaving a place that I came to love
the thought of moving forward and keeping myself busy to keep myself falling into a mindless state of tiredness and depression
the idea that I must get the highest grades to validate my self worth
the endless hours of studying
the pursuit of something different
the idea that I must succeed
the water
the ocean
the swimming pool
the summer days spent splashing and swimming in the waters
the feel of stand between my toes
flip flops and bare feet
the obstacles and joys of swimming and water polo
the ambition and strive I have to live a full life
not settling for less, but striving to the best
the many friendships I have made
the permanent bonds I have made with these friends, who I may call my second family
love
I am from...

A Year In Photos: 2013

What a year, what a year. 2013 has been indescribable. 2013 has been most likely the absolutely most crazy, interesting, your life is going to change kind of year. It has been one of the most incredible years of my life - really. In 2013, I managed to pack up my life in a mere few days and start a new life in Tacoma as a junior at University of Puget Sound in January, try to find a home and community at the school, make a few but AMAZING friends, struggle through the life of a transfer student, get a 4.0 my first semester at UPS (yeah, will likely never happen again), and find (well, not really find but I was pushed to be friends by my good friend Patti) the most amazing boy who has enriched my life with so much sunshine.

And here is 2013 in photos.

January 2013

Sticki picki with the sister before I left for UPS!

February 2013

Settled into Puget Sound, with my new and favorite study spot.

March 2013

After a much needed break, I went down to Ruston Way in Tacoma on a walk alone to experience the peace and quiet. 

April (ish) 2013

Went to go down to Titlow Park with some friends to study.. and look at the tide pool.

May 2013

Point Defiance 

Point Defiance with Patti. This is my first of many adventures with her!

Went to visit my home in Walla Walla.

June 2013

Hiking in Sequoia National Park.

July 2013

Did some canning at home.

Beautiful Mt. Rainer

Camping with the family! 

A trip to International District in Seattle

August 2013

More camping adventures!

September 2013

School started again! This is an orca whale in the Puget Sound. We went whale watching for marine biology.

October 2013

A beautiful October day adventure.

A visit with my bestie from the Wallas.

Shoes.

November 2013

One of my favorite moments with.. my favorite boy who I have grown closer to every day.

Thanksgiving with the family.

December 2013

A trip to Seattle. 

It snowed.. for a couple hours.

Dear Whitman

Dear Whitman,

I dedicate this post to you. I am having some severe nostalgia for you right now. Since October, I also haven't said a proper goodbye or thank you for everything you've done for me, mostly because I was just slightly bitter for having to leave, but I'm now ready to move on. 

On Thursday, the fourth sunny day in a row (a rare occasion) I was able to have a wonderful conversation with a friend who is also a transfer student at UPS this semester. It was one of those conversations, you know, where you can talk forever about anything and everything. We sat outside, soaking in the sun while sipping on some smoothies. Nothing could have been better. We talked about our lives, and mainly about our experiences so far at UPS. This got me really thinking about my time here at UPS, but it also made me really homesick for Whitman. I don't feel homesick that often, but I was experiencing it in full form this weekend. I'm not sure why, but maybe it was the rain that did it.

First of all, I want to thank you for the best 2 1/4 years in Walla Walla. I am sad that I had to leave you, but I am also thankful for all that you done to prepare me for the outside world. I strongly believe that you have prepared me for the path that I am now on. Without having gone to you first, who knows what I would be doing now or how different my priorities, focuses, and values would be. I also thank you for giving me (by having me transfer) the opportunity to refocus my priorities, energy, and time to focus on the things I truly care about at UPS. I've been able to take a step back, reevaluate, and figure out what I want to do differently at UPS than I did at Whitman.

So thank you for..

• The endless opportunities you have given me to allow my personal, intellectual, social, spiritual  and emotional self to grow exponentially.
• The friendships I have made that will last me a life time. Though my time at Whitman was short, I know that the friends I made will be the ones I want to share the rest of my life with.
• Showing me what real friendship is.
• Giving me the opportunity to achieve my life long dreams of traveling to Europe and China on two separate occasions with my favorite professor in the world.
• Giving me confidence in myself to be comfortable with who I am.
• Showing me that I, someone of a quieter demeanor, can lead.
• Laughter.
• Professors who become good mentors and even friends.

Because I am feeling really nostalgic, I really miss...

• The rolling hills of eastern Washington.
• The endless wheatfields that stretch along the highway.
• The endless conversations with friends late into the night.
• The beautiful Walla Walla sunshine.
• The nice walks downtown.
• Sharing life stories.
• The crazy, unpredictable summer thunderstorms.
• Random shenanigans with friends on campus.
• My cubicle in the basement of the library. Also, just the library in general.
• The AWESOME gym and pool. 
• Ankeny field.
• Weekly football practices and games (though we lost.. almost every game)
• My Ohana! Our small family, which has grown so big now, is the best! No one will ever get left behind or forgotten.
• LOTR marathons in the chapter room, which we managed to do twice so far. 
• The herbarium. I miss dead plants.
• Most of all, I miss the feeling of being home, which is a feeling of peace, love, and joy in the company of my Whitman family.

So here's to my friends and favorite memories:

freshman year

 

first theta function freshman year

one of the greatest nights ever, seeing the tallest man on earth.

d-sec reunion (credit to angie)

an unforgettable summer spent with the birds and the bees in sweden

triple in co-ho!

sophomore year trip along the silk road

ohana family, before we expanded

shenanigans on our way to the library

wheatfields

Things at Whitman were not always easy. I remember all too well the endless days of stress, sleepless nights, and frustration. But it is the good things, the precious memories and moments with friends that I remember the best.

For those still at Whitman, appreciate every moment you have in the unique and special place you are. It probably sucks at lot of the time, but remind yourself everyday how lucky you are be there. Spend time with those you love; time is short and it goes by way too quickly to not spend it in the company of friends. If that means taking a little less time to study for that test, do it. In the end, it is not the time studying that you will remember; it is the friendships you make and times you spent together.

So, thank you Whitman for the memories and the experiences you have given me. Thank you for the friendships. I miss you everyday, but I am also happy to be where I am now. I feel so blessed to be at UPS, and I thank you for preparing me for life here.

Sincerely,
A grateful Whittie and Logger

t-25 days

In just a mere 25 days, I will be DONE with this incredible, challenging, surprising, rollercoaster of a semester. I am officially mind blown. How has the time gone by so quickly? How has it almost already been an entire semester? At first, I didn't want it to end, but my goodness, I am sooo done. I am so ready for this semester to be over. I can barely see the light at the end of the tunnel, and there is quite a journey ahead to see the end, but it's there. My motivation is severely lacking, hence why I am writing in here. 

But I have an exciting summer ahead. I still have absolutely no idea what I am doing, and that is just kind of how life is right now... not knowing what is ahead, but just taking each day as its own and trusting that everything is going to be okay. I did find out that I was approved for work-study over the summer, so I WILL have a job! Whew. 

25 days. 25 days. 25 days. 25 days. So close, yet so far. 

best semester ever.

For the first time EVER, I am taking classes to get into occupational therapy school (Anatomy and Dev. Psychology, YAY!) AND I am taking MARINE BIO!!!  I have been waiting soooo long to take these classes. Oh, and I am taking martial arts. I am so excited for next semester!

On top of that, I will actually be living in a house, which I have been waiting for forever.

I am really looking forward to great things next year :)

Letters set free to the world

Throughout the course of the day, I set four love letters free to the world. I left the first letter by the mail room in the basement of the student center after I picked up a package. I set the next three letters free after I went to eat dinner in the student center. I left the second letter tucked in the bench of a booth. I left the third letter on a bulletin board in the basement. Lastly, I made a trip down to the Cellar to get some noms, and I left the last letter in the ice cream freezer, tucked between some ice cream cartons.

When I wrote these, I had originally planned to write only one. After the first one, however, I just couldn't stop. I let my mind wander and my hand go free, and I just kept writing until I finished the fourth letter. After leaving these in odd places, I can now only wonder whose eyes will lay upon them and whose hands they will be held in. That is the magic of these letters; I know not what people will feel or think when they read them, but I can only hope that they will bring at least the smallest bit of hope, encouragement, or love in the lives of those who read them.

Interestingly, it was actually really difficult for me to let these letters ago. I had actually written them two days ago, but I didn't seem to find the "right place" or "right time" to place them on campus. I was hesitant; it felt like I was leaving a little piece of myself to be exposed and vulnerable to the outside world. In one of four of the letters, I wrote a little about my story at UPS.. they were.. some of my deeper and more vulnerable of thoughts that I wanted to share, in the fated chance that the person who may pick it up may relate to what I wrote. Maybe that is why it was difficult for me to let these letters go, for the fear of someone reading them and thinking that they are ridiculous or meaningless. But I have to remind myself that they are anonymous! They are fun! They are meant to spread love! What comes of them are a mystery, and that is part of the enjoyment of writing and leaving them to be read by others :)

First Spring Break in Tacoma

Below are highlights from my first Spring break in Tacoma, WA. Unlike most people, I stayed in Tacoma over the break and enjoyed exploring the new place I have started to begin calling home. For the most part, it was a great break. I spent a lot of the time catching up on homework, applying for jobs, figuring out how to filed my taxes, and sleeping. However, I also spent some time exploring Tacoma and Seattle with friends who visited at the beginning of the break, as well as near the end of the break. 

The highlight of my break was the day that my friends from Whitman visited and we went to explore Seattle. There is something about exploring, about traveling and being adventurous, that bring such peace into my life. When I travel, I don't think about the past, nor do I think about the future; I just experience what is right in front of me, living in the present. I love that. That is why I have a heart for traveling. 

In addition, it was also nice to have a little piece of home fuse with the new. Though my new school has been treating me well, I have also had a hard time adjusting. To an extent, I have adjusted well, but in other ways, it is more difficult. I know that it will only be time that will help me to fully adjust to the new life here with new friends and a new environment. So, having them see my new life here definitely helped, so that I had the opportunity to share what my new life is like. I think that this was important, especially since I moved into college here by myself. Once I left in my truck, saying goodbye to my pops in Portland, I was on my own. 

If anything, this spring break was refreshing, relaxing, and good to help me further adjust to my new life here.

On another note, however, I am freaking out because there is only 6 weeks of class left. I cannot believe how quickly the time has passed since I have been here. I just started school... how can it already be over soon? It scares me how time goes by so quickly, and how I still feel somewhat lost, but soon enough, it's just going to be over! It's just so strange. It's just a reminder, then, to really take each day as its own and live each day to its fullest. 

A vegetable stand in Pike Place, Seattle, WA

A visit to the infamous gum wall in Seattle, WA

Tulips at Pike Place, Seattle, WA. These are my absolute favorite flowers!

Pike Place, Seattle, WA

I took a walk along Ruston Way in Tacoma, WA and found these shells along the water

Along Ruston Way in Tacoma, WA

Attempt at a self-portrait on my walk along Ruston Way, Seattle, WA